Congratulations to Atom Pro Keith Thomson, the creator of Annibelle Scoops, on his new novel Once A Spy. Check out the trailer for a book, which is evidently a thing you need to do to sell a book these days:

Our big siblings Comedy Central have a brand new show coming out on “regular TV” called Ugly Americans, the show by the creators of the Atom series 5-On. The show is amazing and features some awesome animation and really cool, weird characters. Comedy Central has put the first 10 minutes online, so check them out to get yourself ready for the premiere tonight, after an all new South Park.

This guy hops on Chatroulette, a forum for bored teenagers and horny old men to interact anonymously online, and sings at the people he’s chatting with. It’s surprisingly charming and SFW (minus a few cusses).

This is a thumbs up situation.

There are lots of things in the world that Max Silvestri does not understand. Or maybe he just doesn’t pay attention. Each week in this column, Max uses the Internet to figure them out.

Jay Leno is back at 11:30, everybody. Very exciting! The man’s an institution. More like he belongs in an institution, am I right? Or even MORE like America should institute a policy where he is automatically deported to a place that doesn’t have cameras and also killing Jay Lenos is a cultural thing. What an odd policy for the government to enact! Politics are crazy…

If the internet is really going to amount to anything, then it’s time to get serious, folks. The news keeps saying that this viral video thing is going to be big, but we all know that in order for anything to really go global, it has to have a million dollar marketing campaign behind it (right movie executives, RIGHT?).

At ATOM we do it right, so in service of some of our favorite internet memes, we present to you…

Internet Memes With BIG BUDGET MARKETING CAMPAIGNS!

This probably doesn’t need saying again ever, and let me pre-emptively say that I disagree with the amount that the world is unfair, but it’s also clear that Hot Girls are able to do things that Regular People can not. I know, totally bogus.

So today, when Erica and Susan, the creators of the amazing video 2 Girls 1 Cop, came to Atom asking if we could help them spread the word on how they can help the Hot Girl community avoid traffic tickets, the answer was, of course, a resounding “Yes!” It may have actually been a slightly too loud “Yes!” delivered way too eagerly, about an octave above our normal speaking voice, as we frantically brushed chip crumbs out of our hair and our glasses fogged up just a touch.

No biggie, we’re pros.

So, as our service to all those Hot Girls out there who are taking the time and care to follow traffic laws, clear those worries from your pretty (seriously, so pretty) heads and follow these words of advice from Erica and Susan (pictured here for, uh, informational reasons).

10. COLD AS ICE

E+S: When wearing a white t-shirt, turn on the air conditioning. Instead of focusing on your broken taillight, Officer Donut Crème will be sucked in by your glaring headlights.

9. SEARCH AND DESTROY

E+S: …his will. Conveniently have your wallet out of reach. Conveniently be wearing a sun dress with no underwear. Conveniently have baked goods.

8. KNOCKED UP KNOCKOUT

E+S: “Sorry officer, I’m pregnant. I know, hard to believe. But I’m just really skinny.” (And lose the top button.)

7. BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS

E+S: Somebody is dying. We don’t care if it’s Petunia the pug, your twin brother, or your avatar. Just make sure that Officer Tough Nuts will feel responsible for denying you last goodbyes to Tony the parakeet.

6. BLOOD ON THE SEAT

E+S: Ketchup packets. “Sorry officer, I literally just had my period. I leaned over to grab a super plus and just missed the stop sign.” Trust us, he will run like Adrian Peterson… his rookie year.

Time to dust off Grandpa’s tux, cuz Atom is going to the Streamys! That’s right, a bunch of Atom creators are nominated for Streamys, the web’s premiere awards show. Remember back when we asked you guys to nominate your favorite videos? Well, it paid off!  Thanks to your help, some of your favorite shows are now finalists.  Out of thousands of submissions, and hundreds individual shows, the top five were narrowed down by the IAWTV. Indeed, we’re very proud of all the nominations. ..

The weekend is almost here, so treat yourself to a tasty link.

3 Dangerous First Date Mistakes via The Bachelor Guy

25 People With Serious Issues via Manofest

Tiger Woods Press Conference Gift Bag via Maxim

Cool Danish Stop Motion Bunny Party via Uproxx

NBC Advertises Olympics Via Facebook via Sports Pickle

Big Brother Grammar Fail via Yep Yep

There are lots of things in the world that Max Silvestri does not understand. Or maybe he just doesn’t pay attention. Each week in this column, Max uses the Internet to figure them out.

Dear Toyota,

Oh boy. You’ve done gone and blown it GOOD. Remember not that long ago when Priuses were so piping hot that anybody rich with a hint of a whiff of a conscience or at least a desire to appear they had one hopped on waiting lists to get a chance to own one of your cars? You changed the game! Americans seemed finally ready to fully let go of American made cars.

But oops. All your cars are BROKEN…

We were promised in the 90’s that the internet on your tv would be the best thing since the internet on your computer (which was invented shortly after sliced bread). If the first two seasons of Atom TV are any indicator, we’re all going to be using Atom TV to make our PB & J sandwiches reaaaaaaaal soon.

Atom TV will air on Mondays at 2:30 a.m. on Comedy Central and The Atom Show will air on MTV 2 at 11:15 p.m. Fridays. Both times are kind of…