There are lots of things in the world that Max Silvestri does not understand. Or maybe he just doesn’t pay attention. Each week in this column, Max tries to figure a new mystery out by reading the work of the greatest democracy on Earth, Internet commenters.

Blade: The Teen Years (New Moon) brought in over $140 million at the box office last weekend. That is a lot of money! And I realize that it might be tough to actually get a handle on just how much cash that is. To help give you a bit of an idea, I want you to imagine an 18-year-old girl paying one dollar to buy a ticket to the movie. Now, picture 140 million of those girls. Woah, right? (Depending on how loud or how breathily you said “woah” when you imagined all those girls, you might want to go jail now. Call 911 for a really fast cab.)

There are lots of things in the world that Max Silvestri does not understand. Or maybe he just doesn’t pay attention. Each week in this column, Max tries to figure a new mystery out by reading the work of the greatest democracy on Earth, Internet commenters.

What, exactly, is a Twilight? I do not know, but according to professional money estimators it’s going to make somebody a hundred million dollars this weekend. Good for them! Whoever made this movie’s parents should be proud. “Here’s a gold star, shaped like a noose. Wear it like a neck hat!” As I am neither a teenager girl or a teenage girl’s mom (YET) I am confused as to what New Moon is all about. Confused but aroused!